new year, new motto

Hi!

I hope you all had a great holiday and are gearing up for a great 2019.  When I think about all of 2018 I think of a lot of changes – moving out of our beloved home in Hyde Park where we started our family, renovating a house in a completely different neighborhood, starting BOTH girls at a new school, and still getting used to living day to day without Dad.

When I look back on the goals I set for myself in January of 2018, my motto was “live your life with a grateful heart”.  I truly feel like I embraced that motto.  Yes, there is always room for improvement but I definitely tried to spend more time with the people and in the places that filled my heart the most.

When looking even further back to my 2017 New Years post (find it HERE), many of the same emotions remain.  I realize I am only 32 but most days I feel like I have lived 2 different lives.  Almost like 3 different lives actually.  My first life lasted me up until I was 29 – when Bea was diagnosed.

Before that date in March 2015, I was care free and had little to no major upsets in my life.  Nothing that brought me to my knees like having an infant with a life threatening disease.  Dealing with that for an entire year was difficult but we had the transplant to work towards and ultimately there was light at the end of the tunnel.  That time period was fully dedicated to Beatrice’s health and was a very intense and surreal year.

Then, everything happened with Dad.  That day – that morning – changed my life forever.  This is the 3rd life I’m living – one without Dad.  The first part of my life (up until 29 years old) was great, but it wasn’t as deep.  I didn’t love as hard, worry as much, feel as deeply.  I appreciate things more now and cherish the time I have with loved ones.  So, although I wish none of what has happened had happened – I am starting to find the positive effects after something so tragic.

SO – onto my motto for 2019.

I am a perpetually busy person – busy with work, busy with Jordan & the girls, busy with volunteering at organizations I am involved with, busy with keeping track of all things medical, and busy with friends and family.

Just like everyone else that is probably reading this – I feel like I stretch myself too thin.

Over the last 2 weeks I have embraced the “homebody” part of me and spent more time with Jordan & the girls than I think I ever have before.  We stayed home, had cozy nights in, took them to do fun things, cooked, and just enjoyed each other.  I made time for small things like bathtubs, long showers, and face masks and let myself lay in bed with the girls until we were all ready to make it down for breakfast.  It was heaven.

I started thinking that this is the life I could get used to – a slower version of my normal crazy busy one.   I was scrolling through Instagram one night and came across a girl I knew in college (find her Instagram account HERE).  In one of her stories she mentioned about how she was typically a FOMO person and has decided to change things up in 2019 and becoming a JOMO person:

Joy Of Missing Out.

I am totally embracing this motto for 2019.  Yes, I hate to miss fun plans and have a hard time saying no – but whenever I feel like I need a breather and just want to hang at home, I am letting myself feel fine about that.  I am going to embrace those nights and let myself truly enjoy the quiet (before the baby #3 chaos) of 2019.

SO  – no matter what your motto or mantra or thoughts are for 2019 – I wish health, balance, happiness, and positivity to each of you.  And to feel a little JOMO too 🙂

 

Hillary

 

 

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